"My Strange Addiction"


Have you seen this show? It's like a train wreck - you can't look away. The program depicts everyday people who engage in offbeat behaviors like . . . eating foam couch cushions bit by bit or ingesting powdered laundry detergent (toilet paper, chalk, etc.). Some of the compulsions shown are truly horrifying (and many present some pretty serious health risks, too). The foam eater has consumed several COUCHES in her lifetime. I realize the show is meant to appeal to the sideshow watcher in all of us. Obviously it wouldn't bring in many viewers if it were called "My Mild Case of Generalized Anxiety."

Watching the show made me think about whether or not I have any addictions or compulsions. I do like Wild Cherry Diet Pepsi an awful lot. I have a pretty serious issue with Keebler Fudge Sticks. I cannot be trusted around them and therefore have not purchased a box in years (and even if I did, you wouldn't find them in my pantry because I would have eaten the vast majority in one sitting and then hidden the rest). I'm vaguely obsessed with chap stick/lip gloss/lipstick and like to have goop on my lips at all times. I've never quite broken myself of the childhood habit of jumping into my bed from across the room vs. climbing into it like a normal person.  You see, the monsters have excessively long arms and you don't want your ankles getting too close.

That's about all I can think of offhand, at least as far as quirks go.  It's not such a long list, is it? Of course, I can almost hear some of my friends adding their own observations to the list ("Claudia, how about that thing you do where you hold your breath randomly?") My husband would probably also add: my ongoing refusal to fill the ice cube trays and my habit of leaving soda cans in the refrigerator with only one sip left in each. Oh, and not putting the lid back on the vitamins properly so that when he opens the cabinet to get one, a vitamin waterfall cascades onto the floor.  However, I maintain that these are more or less acts of passive-aggressiveness and nothing more.

For some of the people on the show, I really think their issue (or perceived aberration) falls under the category of "personality quirk" and not an addiction.  For example, the ventriloquist lady is harmless at best and irritating at worst. One chick likes to dress up in a furry costume.  There is a whole segment of our population that does this; she's hardly alone.

Anyway, the "My Strange Addiction" series does serve to make me feel downright normal, I guess.  No matter how quirky I may seem, I can always fall back on, "well, sure, but it's not like I eat chalk."