Mother's Day has become a very bittersweet day for me. As blessed as I am to be Kerri's Mommy, I can't help but miss my Mom and Mother in law and my Grandmothers...who are all in a much better place and hopefully smiling down on us.
And then there are the children I never was able to carry in my womb...and those of you who have struggled with infertility probably understand my pain.
Lastly, there is the issue of Kerri's birth Mom and bio Grandmothers...that we most probably will never know. I owe a great deal to these women, and I have no way of thanking them for the incredible gift of Rao Wan Zhen.
As sad as yesterday was, it also was incredibly sweet. Kerri woke me up at 7:30 AM with gifts she made for me, and a triple decker extra margarine sandwich (breakfast in bed). I snuck most of it to Pookie when she was not looking. And hubby made me breakfast later that morning, and did my grocery shopping with Kerri so I could have some alone time (because Kerri said: "You need alone time because we are definitely NOT going to buy you anything at the store."). And of course, they both came home with beautiful Mother's Day cards.
Daddy spent the afternoon trying to teach Kerri how to ride her new bike. I spent part of the afternoon just hanging outside with Kerri and her friends. And dinner at our favorite sushi place was wonderful, and I even got a flower.
So why do I still feel so sad? I am so lucky. I have so much to be thankful for.
And yet...I wish I had all the incredible women who are missing from my life to share it with.
Life with Kerri helps heal the sadness.