Halloween

Today was great. Tanner went trick or treating twice (once at Shad's office this morning and then at the church) and LOVED it. I've never seen him so brave. He was more shy at the beginning, wanting us to hold him and not saying a word, but by the end he didn't want to hold our hand or anything. He would shove his little body through the crowds and say, "trick or treat" and then say "thank you." It was really cute.

Everyone couldn't get over how much hair Kate had. I always get comments, but I got a ton today.

Shad and I were pirates, decked out from head to toe. But by the time we were dressed up, my camera battery died, so no pictures of us. = (

The trunk or treat is over. Yea!!!! It went really well and I learned something important...delegate and then let the people do their assignments. Now I'm on to the Christmas Party. I already have it planned, and every single auxiliary you can image has an assignment. I've asked my Bishop for a committee 3 times and been denied three times with the response, "use the auxiliaries." So, I am going to use the auxiliaries and I am actually really excited about it.

I am really tired, so I'm going to go to bed.

Video of Kate

I got the videos to work

Tanner singing ABCs:




Tanner at the park:

The last couple of days

I just tried to upload videos to Google and it wouldn't work. Has anyone else been having trouble? Or have any tips? I can't understand why sometimes it works great and sometimes it won't work at all. In my "uploaded videos" file it will show the videos but won't open them and says, "you may not be able to view this file."

Tanner "helped" me make chicken pot pie yesterday. He really liked to knead it (something you don't do with pastry dough) and to spread flour on the counter. "I think it needs a little more flour Mom. Okay?" And then he'd take a large fistful and spread it on the counter. Then while I was trying to cut out the leaves for the top, and Tanner would say, "Tanner do it. Tanner do it Mommy." Then he would the cookie cutter out of my hands so fast and before I knew it, he would put a huge leaf indention in the middle of the pastry dough. Again, he was very "helpful". But, it was still worth it. It was just a silly pot pie anyway.


This was before we cooked it. Mom...I used half Crisco and half butter and it turned out GREAT! Maybe someday when I have your baking skills I will be able to cut out the Crisco and still have it flaky like yours. = ) Along with fluffier bread, right?



Kate watches Tanner ride his bike all day long and has taken a liking for it herself. Whenever Tanner will let her (pretty much when he is sleeping), she crawls up to his bike and gets the biggest smile. She LOVES it. I honestly think she tries to get on it and ride it. Usually it starts to roll forward while she's standing next to it, and then she falls over. But she just gets up and tries again. It's so cute. Notice the car in her hand. I really need to buy the poor a doll.


Shad is "race-car" driving today with his buddies. They started going to this track once a year to race each other in these super fast go carts. They're not really go carts but I don't know the name for them. Anyhow, I hope he is safe, because last year he broke his rib doing it.

The most exciting thing for me this weekend, is that we're getting our carpets and couch cleaned. Just in case you wondered, Tanner has had diarrhea shoot through the side of his diaper twice on our couch and who several times on our carpet. I know you're all jealous. So the poop along with yogurt, soy milk and spit up are all going to vanish out of our carpets and couch today. Again, I am so excited.

Our pool is filthy and I need to clean it today. I actually enjoy cleaning it. It's so nice to be outside looking at pretty water while I clean.

Pictures

It's Friday...I LOVE Fridays.

Here are some pics from this week. Poor Kate doesn't really like Tanner to hold her, but I thought they were cute anyway.

I made and frosted the cookies at the bottom.

Hardly a 5-star..

Everything about this picture is so wrong. I still chortle every time I get a glimpse of it, which would mean I was in the time capsule again. Do you remember Kel? There it was bigger than life on the marquee as we pulled up. Rooms & Efficiencies. Phones. Large Pool. (not safe to swim in) HBO Rooms. And my favorite. Working Mans Rates!! The parking lot was full of pick-up trucks too. This would be our home for the weekend.

My friend since before Saturday Night Fever was a smash hit, Kelly aka "Kel-tini" and I hooked up with her brother and some friends in Rehoboth Beach a few years ago for a little "get-away". We suspected with Chris in control and organizing the weekend we were in safe hands. This was his thing. We did not give a second thought when he anxiously volunteered to take care of all hotel accommodations with a slightly suspicious chuckle. You see, loving brother is one of those "connected" types(you have no idea how connected) and travels the world sleeping umm staying with Kings, Queens, Ambassadors and the likes of dignitaries in far away places (countries that I can't even pronounce--and I've traveled!) that we only hallucinate about. Yes, we live vicariously through him. He swears he works for the U.N.(lives in Paris) but we've always surmised it's something "Top secret" with the Feds. Yes, I have an active imagination. Surprise, surprise. Anyway, you can imagine our dismay when we pulled up the to luxurious "Fountain Motel". We convinced ourselves there was another Fountain Motel. There must be some mistake. We left. Convinced ourselves there was something bigger and splashier. There was no fountain. It was a bird bath of sorts with a bit of a sputter and splatter. After finally catching Chris on his cell and he confirming that we were at the right place we gathered our belongings and checked in. If we thought the outside was bad we were in for a bigger surprise when we opened the door to our home for the weekend. Nothing could have prepared us for the stink that smacked us in the face like road kill. And the filth! We couldn't stop laughing and then there were the "resident's of the motel. I think some of them might have had permanent residency there. No teeth, chain smokers, alcoholics. It would be a weekend not to be forgotten. Ever.

Kel, do you remember how badly this room smelled? And the candles Chris just so happened to bestow upon us?! hmmm makes me wonder how often he had set friends up at there. Scary?! No, this is not one of Jerry Garcia's band member's or groupies! It's my dear friend legal beagle Kelly. We did have a great time with the boys that weekend, didn't we?!

Believe

A friend (a dear friend) of mine sent this poem to me. It made me cry. There have been times in my life where I have questioned if there was anyone "out-there". This gave me goose bumps. See for yourself.

A drunken man in an Oldsmobile
they said had run the light.

That caused the six-car pileup
on 109 that night.

When broken bodies lay about
and blood was everywhere,

The sirens screamed out eulogies,
for death was in the air.

A mother, trapped inside her car,
was heard above the noise,

Her plaintive plea near split the air,
"Oh, God, please spare my boys!"

She fought to loose her pinned hands,
she struggled to get free,

But mangled metal held her fast
in grim captivity.

Her frightened eyes then focused
on where the back seat once had been,

But all she

saw was broken glass and
two children's seats crushed in.

Her twins were nowhere to be seen,
she did not hear them cry,

And then she prayed they'd been thrown free,
"Oh, God, don't let them die!"

Then firemen came and cut her loose,
but when they searched the back,

They found therein no little boys,
but the seat belts were intact.

They thought the woman had gone mad
and was traveling alone,

But when they turned to question her,
they discovered she was gone.

Policemen saw her running wild
and screaming above the noise
In beseeching

supplication,
"Please help me find my boys!"

"They're four years old and wear blue shirts,
their jeans are blue to match."

One cop spoke up, "They're in my car,
and they don't have a scratch."

"They said their daddy put them there,
and gave them each a cone,

"Then told them both to wait for Mom
to come and take them

home."

"I've searched the area high and low,
but I can't find their dad."

"He must have fled the scene,
I guess, and that is very bad."

The mother hugged the twins and said,
while wiping at a tear,

"He could not flee the scene, you see,
for he's been dead a year."

The cop just looked confused and asked,
"Now, how can that be true?"

"The boys said, "Mommy, Daddy came
and left a kiss for you."

"He told us not to worry
and that you would be all right."

"And then he put us in this car with
the pretty, flashing light.

"We wanted him to stay with us,
because we miss him so."
"But Mommy, he just hugged us tight

and said he had to go."

"He said someday we'd understand
and told us not to fuss."

"And he said to tell you, Mommy,
"He's watching over us."

The mother knew without a doubt
that what they spoke was

true,

For she recalled their dad's last words,

" I will watch over you."

The firemen's notes could not explain
the twisted, mangled car,

And how the three of them escaped
without a single scar.

But on the cop's report was scribed,
in print so very fine,

"An angel walked the beat tonight on Highway 109."

The cutest kids in the world

Alright, I might be slightly biased, but they are dang cute.

Projects I've been working on

Putting up family pictures.


Kate's pictures in her room.


My fall decorating.



This is Tanner's pigsty of a playroom (and this is the cleaner side of the room). However I have been striving to get it organized and make it a place Tanner wants to be. Shad and I put together this shelf and all of the green boxes to put his toys in. Can you see from the pictures how well our system is working? I'm being sarcastic. Shad says we should just quit trying to organize the toys and let them be in a big pile.



This is a chalkboard/magnetic wall I've been working on. The painting is done, but I still need to put up the molding.
Here's an update on my food storage. Are you sick of it yet?? =) I think if I weren't me, and I saw this blog, I would think, "What a freaking psycho. Does she think she needs a grocery store in her house?" However, I LOVE it. Since I have organized it, with a rotation system and my chart on the wall (you can see it on the left in the pic), I go in there several times a day just to look at it. I'm still not done, but I'm getting there.



This is part of my outside freezer.

I've realized lately that these are my loves and hobbies. Decorating the house, taking/putting up pictures, figuring out how to use our food storage. I sound like a nerd, but I really do love this stuff.

This morning I cleaned our filthy pool. Tanner helps me do it, or he thinks he is helping = ) I talked to Danielle with a headset on while I did it. Isn't technology great?

I started walking with a my friend Shari every morning at 6:20am. It has been wonderful! I love it. I getting up when it's still dark and I could be sleeping, but once I get out there, I feel so good. It's so nice to have a whole hour to myself and worked out before the the kids wake up.

Kate is barely crawling. She's been doing the army crawl for a while, but she is starting to get up and crawl on all fours. It is so cute. She gets stuck under chairs, tables and highchairs, but I think she loves being more mobile. Tanner hates and loves her mobility. He likes that she is more like him, somewhat of a peer, but doesn't like that she will come over to his perfectly arranged cars, or block towers and mess them up. "Don't Tate. Don't touch it." I hear this over and over all day.

Both kids are asleep right now. Yea! A rarity in this house. I should probably go get dressed since I'm still in my workout clothes, varicose vein stockings and make-up from yesterday. I mean, I think I look like a hottie, but others may disagree. = ) Have a great weekend.

Before it all went "south"

Stop licking the picture. Just stop!! It's not real. Well not in real time anyway! Yes, it is legitimately me it really, really is before my guaranteed pay raise appendage and the mantelpiece (gut) I now schlep with me every where I go like a horny 16 year old boy--or my husband. As I look at this centerfold body (Ok, so I turned down Playboy's offer-In my mind that is.) although I did not think it was gorgeous back then...funny back then I thought I'd always have that body. lol I'm wondering where the rack not "that" rack that I'm now serving refreshments on came from. I swear it just showed up one day. Poof. Uninvited. Note to self must get keister back in the gym., before I become anorexic! Falling into depression. I'm not 25 any longer! The only thing that has not fallen are the "ta-ta's"!

I'm off to meet my dear friend Annie and her "twinkies for a day of shopping and fun......Have a great weekend.

Blogging

Here are the two reasons I haven't been blogging. Number 1, I have been over the top obsessed with getting our food storage in order. Every spare moment has been spent on that. Number 2, I feel like I can't post unless I also have time to read everyone else's blog and comment on their blogs. Sound crazy? Do any of you feel like that? But I really do want this to be like our family history and I need to record some things, whether or not I have time to read other blogs, so here's an update.

Shad
-Went to the cannery for us....what a sweet husband.
-Went out to DC to sign papers with a professional athlete who plays for the Washington Redskins. I guess this is a very hard thing to do (to manage a pro athletes money). His partner had some connections and with some luck (and skill) they landed the account. They are hoping this leads to more athletes.
-Tanner continues to prefer Shad over me 24 hours a day. They are the best of friends.

Me
-Food storage...food storage...and more food storage. I have got to be driving my friends crazy with my obsession. However, I am almost done. I just need borrow the canner and can some more grains.
-Shad and I went out to dinner last weekend to the nicest restaruant I've ever been to. We went to Wallys (Rose I asked for you but you weren't there that night, and Shad just gave me the note you left like 2 days ago). It was superb and so nice to enjoy a dinner with Shad and without children on our laps.
-I have been trying to perfect making my Mom's whole wheat bread recipe. When we were in Oregon Tanner ate at least 5 pieces a day. We got home, I made a batch, he had about 3 bites of one pieces and said, "all done mommy." Apparently he could tell the difference between mine and my mom's. Someday.....
-I am now the pool woman. We fired our pool man a couple of weeks back and Shad hired me instead. = )

Tanner
-The biggest news in his life is that he will finally wear shoes!!!!! It has always been a fight to get the kid to wear shoes, and when he does he will only wear Robeez (hippie leather shoes). He has refused to wear any other shoe besides those. When we have gotten him to try on other ones he trips because he's not used to normal shoes. Robeez are great and all, but he's about to grow out of them. So we bought him the most flexible tennis shoes we could find and kept them out with his toys for about a month, so he could at least get used to them. Then Shad told him they were "Really fast shoes." They would go on runs around the block, Tanner would trip and cry all the way home, but eventually he got used to the shoes and now he loves them.
-"dang it" is his favorite phrase. Shad blames it on me, I blame it on him.
-The other day I was really tired and Tanner wanted me to play. I told him I was too tired and needed to lay down. Then he climbed up on the couch, put his arms around me and said, "It's okay Mommy, Daddy be home soon." Then he rubbed/scratched my arm (with his other arm still around me) and said, "Do you like that Mommy?" He was so sweet and I loved every moment.

Kate
-Kate has been sick off and on, waking up screaming, crying during her naps, pulling at her ear and bawling if I set her down. I took her to the doctor today and she is free of bladder and ear infections. Maybe teething?
-The most beautiful little girl. We seriously get stopped every where we go by people telling her how pretty she is. The other day on a walk, a car passing stopped and pointed at Kate, smiling. And she just eats it up and gives a huge grin to anyone who looks her way.

Here are some pics:

I do have talent....

There is never a lack of babble in our cave and as you know nothing is off limits. Ever. I dole out bits and pieces of our sometime all too humorous real world with any who wish dare to pass through. Fh and I were preparing for bed the other night and I was expounding about how I wish I could come up with something creative like her to sell when I was hit with a bolt of lighting! Shazam I think I've got it. Anyway, I didn't really think fh was tuned into what I was flapping my jaws about, but he was all ears. Fascinated.

We were discussing (I initiated---he was listening) my hair brained brainstorm ingenious idea which included me and a sewing machine. Stop laughing! I do have talent. Well, in my think trap I do.

Fh: "Um, honey, only one problem." "You don't know how to sew"! Oh, bother.

Me: Not one to ever let that impede me. "Yeah, yeah I know, but really how hard could it be"?! "Besides I've already inquired about taking a sewing class'.

Fh: "Really"?

Me: "Well, of course"! I have.

Fh: "Um, sweetie, did it occur to you that you don't possess a sewing machine"?

Me: "Yeah, but I did a little research and I can purchase one from Costco for a mere $150.00". Problem solved. Now I can put my plan in motion.

Fh: "How much will it cost to make these "award-winning" aprons"? (I want to make sexy hot designer aprons like in the picture) "What kind of cost are involved"? "And how many can you make a day'? Key for fh. How much???.....

Me: Great, he wants a business plan. "I don't know, maybe I could bribe pay some unsuspecting soul to make them"! I'm already thinking I could set up some type of assembly line working 24/7 and maybe outsourcing too!

Fh: 'Laughing, and maybe you could make the girls clothing too".

Me: Ok, now that was just mean. "I think that may be a long shot"!

Fh: Yeah, they'll loathe you when they hit junior high and want you to finance the latest trends in clothing and you respond "I can make that for you"!

Me: Laughing. I remember the outfits my mom made for my sisters and I when we were growing up. Matching too!

Fh: Maybe you could make my suits. *snorting*

Me: Eyes rolling, and snickering...... Funny man.....

Note: After speaking to my mom tonight she reminded me that I do in fact own a sewing machine. I inherited my grandmother's when she passed! I'd completely forgotten that I had it. Must dig it out of the vault tomorrow. Running to check out his site....

Clearing the cob-webs

Conversation that Katie bug and I had tonight.

Katie: "Mommy, (pointing) spider nose". As she was inspecting my nostrils.

Me: "What, mommy doesn't have spiders in her nose. In my stern mommy voice and scratching nose. Like I possibly could!

Katie: Yeah, mommy spider in nose". She was positively no doubt about it sure that I had spiders as she clearly pointed out with such conviction.

Fh: My luck the whole fam-dango feels the need to give their two cents worth--unsolicited! "She's probably looking at your long nose hairs"!

Me: "Gross, I don't have nose hairs". Ok, so maybe I do.

Fh: "Um, yes you do"! Looking sheepish.

Katie: As she is trying to pull the spiders out of my nose. "Mommy spider".

Me: Jumping up to go eyeball my nose in the mirror with my glasses on. Yep, I have nose hairs as long as my pube hairs! Ewwwww. Note to self: Must have nose hairs waxed the next time I have legs waxed!!

A day in our life

Yes, yes I know.... I missed Retro Friday. Big deal. I know, you delight in anticipation with the crazy ass stuff I'm going to dole out each week like a fine wine to be sucked and savoured. Really, I'm not all that engaging. Err, well not to any that really know me. Right Sen? Right Cindi? So, what have I been doing this past week? I've been indulging in being a mommy. Immersing myself. I've been baptized! Spending time getting to know my two little phenomenons. Iconcede with each passing day how charmed my orbit is. They are the best gift anyone could ever bestow upon me. Precious stones. So, this is our week in a whirlwind:

Girls experienced their first ever discovery of Pumpkinville with a fever like nothing I've ever, ever had so much fun witnessing . They clacked and chattered like parrots, no mima bird chirping "pumpkin, pumpkin, pumpkin mommy". I teased and taunted that if they were good they could pluck their very own little pumpkin..... if they were good...and they were.... and they did.....Ahhh--trained well.

Sadly it finally happened. We had our first ever awkward moment from *gasp* another adoptive parent! I had observed these two heavenly little girls (about 8-10 years old) while we were shoe shopping. They were dressed identical although they didn't look anything alike(both were dreadfully sad looking) and they were Asian. (parent's as nilly willy white and blue eyes as I) I felt we had a commonality, (you know since I have the two Asian Doll's.) so hesitantly I asked "are they twins"? I could not have possibly prepared myself for the anger that gushed from this unmannerly woman's lips. She snapped "They're sister's"! (As if I'd asked an intrusive question) She never as much gave me a side ways glance or acknowledged that I too was akin to her before she assumed I was assaulting her. My youngsters were running around screaming and giggling and you'd have had to be deaf, blind not to notice(they are too cute for their own good)all that we had in common! I glanced at her little girls who had such a sorrowful pathetic look in their eyes. I surmised her behavior was commonplace and oh-so expected. OK, so yes we've all (yes, me too) have been attacked and assaulted and asked the unimaginable, but to ascertain that every quip is the spitting image?! I was speechless. She plainly had no suspicion of the message she was sending to her beautiful daughter's. My heart ached for them. They noticed K&A having so much fun skipping, dancing and singing with such glee. I walked away without saying another thing to this sorry excuse for a mother.

I've been dropping little innuendo's to fh that girls have grown out of their footwear. We're lucky as we have an outlet mall minutes from our home loaded with kids shoe stores. Well, not so lucky I discovered the other day. You all know I don't do anything unpretentious. Fact is I suffer from O.C.D. I do everything big. Really big. Which means a good day would score 3-4 pair of shoes each. For all of us! Not so today. Somehow we landed at Nordstrom's(damn auto pilot) although I'm not sure how. (stop laughing!) Unfortunately I did find the cutest (really, really adorable) shoes by Primigi. You guessed it, one pair....... Only. One. Each! E-x-p-e-n-s-i-v-e!! Anyway,y the highlight of the day was after Katie had her melt down (shoe salesman measuring her foot caused her to collapse--drama) the pretty lady sitting across from us said "doesn't it make you want to have another dozen"? I smiled. She thought we were just like her. AND SHE COULD SEE ME..... Wow... Of course didn't help that Katie kept saying "Mommy has gas" followed by "Katie got gas". Must work on the grammar! She did have gas though. I did not however! Really.

Daddy shared a funny--OK maybe I shouldn't be sharing but oh, what the hell. It's priceless. He was on kiddie duty today. Mommy working. He must have had a temporary black out and forgot to lock the bathroom door when the little girls charged in. He said they were stalled in their tracks. They both peered closely (g-d knows it's huge!)at what he was holding and even cocked their heads to get a better look. Ahhhh, I'm only sorry I missed that moment. I'm only imaging what our potty training will now be like.

Food Storage

I finally took an inventory of our food storage and realized that even though it looks like we have enough food for a year, in reality we MIGHT have enough for 3 months. By the way, the pics above are what might be 3 months of food storage.

So I spent hours and hours figuring out what we could survive on, what my kids would actually eat, calculating how many pounds of grains equal how much flour, how much wheat, baking powder, etc I would need to make Tanner pancakes everyday, and on and on. I also made a chart to keep track of my inventory. I figure this might help some of you or inspire you (hopefully not overwhelm). I will attach them to this post.

I didn't include emergency essentials or water on here. It is strictly food.

Okay, so apparently you can't attach word docs. If you want any of this info, put your email in a comment and I'll email it to you.

Keeping the crazies in.....

Beware: what you are about to read is true. Really. But it's my true......My world. Buckle up!

• Life behind the great wall is one copious tangled scandal. A Fantasy Island of sorts(without Tattoo) brimming with fascinating people, who's who, and who's what, who's doing who (did I say that out loud?) and marked with fence chatter and free flowing sauce. Oh the gossip! Shocking at times--even for me! Desperate Housewives in living colour. A real life "Wisteria" Lane! OK. So our neighborhood has a gate. Big deal. The purpose initially was to keep scum of the earth the obnoxious out. But as I re-evaluate the latest events behind the "pearly" gates I'm now convinced it's to keep crazy ass nut jobs the defective and decayed safe from society! That's right. A compound for misfits. "You can check in but you can never leave". Yes, we're one big mess of a community, but no more than the norm. Oh, stop looking at me like that. We all have our skeletons, however some would rather refute than seek help. On to some of the more news worthy tongue wagging overheard on the treadmill between panting and gasping....
  

• Our fitness trainer who I reluctantly forked over the youngin's college fund to have abs of steel and an ass that set up at attention (he promised...he really, really did...honest) was having a nooner*gasp*with a skinny hot mommy. It's not uncommon for him to make "house-calls' but I should have suspected something was up with the big ole' calling card she left on his neck and the smile on his face when we met for our bi-weekly appointments. No, I wasn't offered the same "special" she was and no, I wasn't jealous. Not really. Although he did have a tripping body. I'm still puzzled. How did she find the time or energy? You know with raising 6-kiddies?! That's right. Hell, I barely remember to put underwear on before running out the door. Who am I kidding? I seldom remember to use pitt defuser. It's only when I get a whiff of something vile waifing through the air, nose hairs curling that I find myself going ah-ha. That's what I forgot! But, how did she find the time ?! With getting kids on the bus, cleaning the house, lunch with the ladies, bang the trainer and then home to prepare dinner and help kids with homework and all with a smile for the hubs? Wow. But her sleazy dh was busy having his own rendezvous. There has been numerous discussion on who stepped out on who first. Was he the one sniffing around looking for a little "strange" or was it mommy dearest? Hmm. But even more interesting seedy dh was having fling with the fitness trainer's wife to be. Musical beds. Oh, oh, oh and the future "Mrs." schlepped drinks at our clubhouse for coins. Two-timing married couple have separated and hot skinny mommy (46 years old) is shacking up with 29 year old trainer with her kids in tow. If I hadn't seen it with my own peepers I would have doubted it. Lol. Need some of her Mo-jo. Last time I bumped into her she was simply radiant. It appears she is getting her daily work-out.
  



• Our parish was voted (full bragging rights) the number one swinger's community in northern Virginia. Yes, numero uno!! This was broadcast on of our local simulcast. Big buzz of the town. I want to know who actually voted because I knew nothing about it and did not get to cast my vote! You want to know who the swinger's are, right? Or how you can join and if there is a secret password or hand shake?! I know how you sex crazed mommas think and some of you already in your car heading for my neck of the woods. Well, it's easy. If you want to "frolic" you arrange white pebble like stones around your shrubbery. Mark your territory. Wave your freak flag proudly!! No, fh and I are not part of this crowd! Really. We weren't asked to be honorary members... Maybe this is where fh could burn off some of that pent up steam?! Note to self check out houses with the stream of smiling people....
  

• The Thai Princesses shared a funny with us the other night. Apparently our neighbor reported her car stolen. True, we've got some
  spoiled rotten rich kids unmanageable kids in the neighborhood, but this would be brave for them. You remember we do have a gate on the joint tighter(laughing really loud!) than Alcatraz! (bone of contention for some!) No one could possibly steal a car and slip by Sargent Barney Fife. Our security guard. He was employed to protect us. Insert big snort. Anyway, neighbor woke nanny up to
  cross examine question where she parked the *cough* mini van. Nanny quipped "where I always do... the driveway".... duh... Hot skinny neighbor became panic stricken. Unglued. Unhinged. Frantically dialing 411 the police AND even summoned Security Guard! Umm, yeah a bit erratic. Imagine how red-faced she was to receive call from the repair shop advising car was ready for pick-up. Yup, she had taken the mommy machine in the day before to be serviced. I'm guessing there was a little more in the coffee than just cream. No, this was not me. I swear. Shame on you for thinking like that.
  

• I asked my fh (in that whispery voice that she suggested) if he would do me(he probably only heard "do me") a favor and douse the plants for me. He of course couldn't have been more accommodating. You would have thought that there was a little "lip" action attached to my request. Too tired... He came in awhile later snickering. I asked "what is so funny'? He said "Amy (not her real name) asked if the plants were dirty"? I looked at him with a clueless look wondering why she would ask something so odd. But of course thinking to myself I thought maybe she was "high". Anyway, fh reminded me that he was watering with the laundry detergent container. Of course true to form Jeff replied to her, "yes, they really do get dirty" and kept right on watering! He thought it was so humorous. He said you'll probably see her out there scrubbing her plants with laundry soap.
  

• Our most recent piece of shit crap-ola circulating in my hood is that we are a commune without a leader. Oh, great. Just like our country. Move to my hood, there are no rules and no leaders! Our HOA manager and entire staff has finally had it. They've quit. We've had our own issues with the way our community has been managed. People just do their own thing here and with no regard for their neighbors. It's always been run a little "Willy Nilly", the blind leading the bling. Any hopes of utopia were short lived. Wishful thinking. Fh went to the HOA meeting to voice his/ours (which translates: mine) concern for the jackass that lives directly in back of us. He surmised his family plot was not nearly momentous enough for his
  greed craving to be big man on the block. So, what did he do? He killed off the protected interest behind his castle which interestingly enough is the escape hatch to our domicile. Arrogant butthole, asswipe. Just daring someone to challenge him. Of course we attacked with a venom. Like any covert operation we were able to shoot photos from our portico of subject in action killing off the woods. The protected coveted area. Single handed! The HOA imposed the maximum annual punishment. An
  astronomic dinky $900.00 hush money not to mention attached a lien on his fortress. Cocky homeowner could give a rat's ass and to add insult to injury he presides on the Membership Board!! We are petitioning to have him impeached and thrown off the board. If he didn't want to follow the protocol why did he set up shop in our hood? Now, I know there are some of you who reside in a HOA neighborhoods and who feel they have the Nazi's running their community. Well let me tell you--you don't want this. A loose ship in the harbour without a captain!! Ever.
  

• I put girls down for a little shuteye cuz I needed a breather and wanted to catch up on my soaps reading when after 40 minutes I could still hear them chattering and laughing at one another. I smiled to myself. This is what I had waited for. It warmed my heart. Truly. But, I reluctantly pulled myself from the sofa. I knew I needed to evaluate the situation. They were after all supposed to be napping. I was all prepared to use my stern mean mommy voice but I was caught off guard when I bolted into their room. There sitting in a spread-eagle was Abbey with diaper off (naturally) bent over and touching her "who-who". Not only was she touching it but she was clearly checking out every crease and fold as if to see if she could figure out what made it work! I was speechless. I mean granted at some point she will "touch it" and maybe even "stroke it" but I wasn't expecting it to be Now. Not at two! My eyes reverted over to Katie who was just sitting in her crib quietly singing to herself. Yes, her diaper was off too but she wasn't as curious as her partner in crime. I think I would have freaked if they both were getting "busy' with themselves. Katie however had tossed her wet diaper on the floor and had helped herself to a new one. You might remember we had resorted to using gorilla tape to keep the girls in their diapers at night. Well, it looks like they will be wearing "special" diaper at nap time too. What next? Strip clubs?! Pole dancing?!

Last of the Oregon Pics

We finally made it home. Oregon was incredible, but it's always so good to be home. Tanner was ecstatic to see Shad and continues to act like I don't exist if Shad is in the room, but he still asks for "Oregon".

This is Ruby (Tanner's cousin), my Mom and Tanner making sugar cookies. He has asked to make "white cookies" everyday since we've been back. It used to be, "I want no bakes," or "I want chocit chip cookies", but now it's "white cookies with fwosting". = )



Kate has been sick these last couple of days. I'm worried it's another bladder infection, so I will take her in Monday morning when the labs open. She hasn't been eating much and is sleeping a ton. She usually smiles if you even glance her way and now she just looks at you with the saddest expression. This picture is from Oregon though....she was GREAT the whole trip.


Megan and Tanner having "tea". Meg did my hair when I was up there and I LOVE it. She did my roots and gave me tons of layers.


I think if I would've let her, Meg would've taken Kate home with her. I loved watching the two of them. Megan was always holding and cuddling her.



I think Tanner has a crush on my sister Amy. When we got home, he told me that he was going to marry "Amy.....with cars".